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At the beginning of every New Year I seem to make the same resolution... Read my bible daily. Pray more. Genuinely study the gospel. Have faith. Talk to God. Trust. Experience joy, regardless.

I'm reading two bible studies right now that I am becoming more obsessed with every day. One of them is called Restless; it's not as much a bible study as it is a "how to" when it comes to coping with your wants, needs, and God's plan for your life. It is a life changing book. I have felt so restless over the last year. Restless in terms of wanting the hardships to be over. Restless in waiting for the perfect job and opportunity to come my way. Restless in terms of my relationship and the next step we need to take. Restless in wondering if my personal dreams line up with God's dreams for me. This book has taught me that it's not about what I want for myself, but what God wants me to do for His kingdom.

"What if we took pieces of our lives (no matter what the world says they are worth) and began to use them to help others flourish for the sake of Christ? All of a sudden our motives would narrow to contain more of God and others, and less of us." - Restless

Trust.

The other bible study book I'm reading is the book I am studying in my E-Group, Becoming Myself. It is about knowing that God is greater than anything in this world. That when you surrender your life to him, and let him write your story, it is going to be way more amazing than anything you could ever narrate yourself. It focuses on relinquishing fear and anxiety, and gaining faith. It has moved me in so many ways. I've always dealt with anxiety, over stupid things like fear that my family will get hurt in some crazy way, or over my future. Becoming Myself teaches me that we shouldn't fear the unknown, because God knows all.

"You probably know what you have been afraid to entrust to God. When we surrender our fear, we are offering it to Jesus. We are saying "This fear is too much fear for me to bear. I give it to you because I believe you are good and worthy of my trust." When we actively, by faith, lay down our fears at the feet or Jesus, we pick up his love in return. It is an uneven trade, a heavenly exchange." - Becoming Myself

Faith.

It sounds silly, but when I read these books I get this bizarre feeling in my stomach. It's a mix between wanting to burst out laughing, and getting butterflies. I've always felt this way, and I've always thought it was so strange. It wasn't until recently that I realized what this feeling is... it's joy. It's joy and happiness that bubbles up inside me when I realize that I have nothing to worry about. God is in control. How awesome is that? God has my life planned out!! Now I am embracing this feeling. I love it and I can't wait to see what journey I am taken on with this fresh perspective.

Cheers to 2015!

Becoming My (Restless) Self.

At the beginning of every New Year I seem to make the same resolution... Read my bible daily. Pray more. Genuinely study the gospel. Have fa...
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Wow. All I can say is wow when I think of this year. My life lately has been so crazy, it literally feels surreal. Let me just give you an update...

Two weeks ago my parents went out of town for my dads birthday. I was home alone for five days, and during that time Sean's dad was declining very, very quickly. We all knew it was getting towards the end. I was really scared and anxious to be staying by myself during such a stressful time. I worked a lot, and every second I had I spent at Sean's house. I didn't know when everything would end, but I knew that God's timing was going to be perfect. Tuesday night after a long day at work, I decided to finally watch The Fault In Our Stars (I'd been waiting for weeks, knowing what it was about) with a glass of wine and some pumpkin chocolate chip muffins and have a good cry. I didn't know how ironic that moment would feel the next day! I know it sounds stupid and cheesy, but that night I just sat by myself watching this movie, thinking about Sean and his family and their time together. I didn't want to go to sleep, as if I was subconsciously aware of what was going on. I stayed up until 2 am watching TV, wide awake, and when Sean got home from work in the middle of the night he said his dad's breathing was heavy and slow. His dad wasn't responding and seemed to be in a deep sleep. We all mentally prepared ourselves. Wednesday, October 8th, my parents were flying home and my twin sister was flying to Charlotte to visit NC for the weekend. I was going to have the comfort of friends and family around me when I needed them the most. That day, at 1:30 in the afternoon, Sean's dad passed away. He was surrounded by family and prayer, and went peacefully. I'll never forget watching Sean say goodbye, I think my heart literally broke into a million pieces. God's timing is hard, but always greater than what we could pick for ourselves. Day by day we are given more joy and more peace to help us cope with the grief that we all feel. Nothing is worse than losing a loved one, but knowing Sean's dad is no longer in pain and that we'll see him again one day is so comforting! Great is God's faithfulness - His mercies are new every morning! (Lamentations 3:23)

Sean has been so strong. It's insane how much we've gone through together. I feel like we are closer and more in love than some married couples. We are strong! We can face anything! I love him more than I ever thought possible. I truly admire his ability to face challenges with a positive attitude, patience and resilience. This guy is a stud, my best friend, and the love of my life! We're ready for a challenging yet exciting year full of fun and new beginnings.
Top, Urban Outfitters. Scarf, N/A. Sweater, Fab'rik. Bag, Kate Spade. Denim, Urban Outfitters. Sunglasses, Versona. Boots, Forever 21.

The Ups and Downs of Life.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014
One thing that I'm so thankful for while I'm living here at home is my church. My pastor is so awesome, I can't even describe how much I enjoy his sermons! He's made my church family come alive over the last year and he's evoked in me a spirit of wanting to get out there and make a difference, not just in my own life, but in the lives of the nearest, neighbors and the nations. If you want to listen to a captivating, funny, heart-warming pastor, that strengthens your faith but doesn't tip-toe around important issues, go over to the Carmel Baptist website! You can watch them on your laptop at home, or on your Kindle at the gym! I promise this isn't meant to be a "commercial" type post, I just really wanted to share it with you all. God is working here in the Queen City, and I love it!

This outfit is a classic look that I wore to church on Sunday, with a little "private school girl" spin to it. Nothing too edgy or boho, but still sweet. Excuse my messy pony-tail and hidden bangs. I just throw my hair up however I can when I have to get out the door quickly... which I usually do on Sunday mornings because I am not a morning person. 
Also, I still can't believe I bought this skirt for only 3 dollars from Goodwill. Major steal! I'm probably rocking a piece of someone's old uniform, and I don't hate it... (Also, random 70 degree days make me happy!)
Skirt, Goodwill. Top, Forever 21. Cardigan, Target. Headband, N/A. Boots, H&M. Cross Bracelet, Hand Picked. Pink Lipstick, Mary-Kay.

Classic School Girl Style

Sunday, March 2, 2014
These last few days have been a little crazy. Last Thursday I took a spur of the moment trip to Greenville to visit my boyfriend! He hasn't been able to come home yet with everything that's going on, so when I heard that my neighbor was making the trek down to ECU in the snow, I decided to go along with her to save money on gas and see the love of my life!
It was a low key weekend. All we did was relax, watch movies, cook comfort food, eat way too much,  sip on coffee, play in the snow, hug on Cubbie and hug on each other. I missed him so much! While I was there we started watching the Netflix series House of Cards and instantly got hooked! This show is seriously amazing. You need to check it out! It's intense, sarcastic, and a crazy unique perspective on politics. We already have less than half left before we get through the whole first season.

Monday night I got home from Greenville, ate dinner, caught up with my parents, and then went straight to sleep. Tuesday I had a big interview with a company I've been in contact with for a couple weeks now, located about 2 hours outside of Charlotte. I went to my interview, which was way shorter than I imagined, and then changed into comfortable clothes and treated myself to a delicious lunch for one in the middle of downtown.
The whole interview/meet-and-greet experience didn't go as I expected it to, but it was definitely an adventure that made me stronger! If you wanna hear God laugh, tell him your plan, right? That's my favorite quote these days! This one is pretty legit, too...
Sorry for the lack of posts this week! I've been busy, as you can see. What have you been up to lately?

Insta-Recap

Thursday, February 6, 2014
Well, last week was hard.

As you know, I have been dating my amazing and adorable boyfriend for over four years now. I can't express how much he means to me. He makes me smile every single day, he treats me way better than I deserve, he's my best friend, my person, and I look forward to a long, long life with him by my side.
When Sean and I first started dating I was curious and excited by the difference in our families. My family coming from a background of North Carolina mountains and Mississippi backyards, and his Italian-Irish roots branching from New Jersey, New York, and Italy and Ireland themselves. After lots of heaping helpings of secret spaghetti sauce, dinners around the table, trips to the Jersey shore, Beech Mountain and Myrtle Beach, apple sauce and sauerkraut, long car rides and heartfelt hugs, I became even more attached to his family. His parents, aunts, uncles and cousins are some of the most loving people I've ever met. They are the ones who have raised him to be the guy that I love so much.
      
Back in October Sean's dad came down with a horrible cough and cold. He took multiple trips to his doctor through November, Thanksgiving, December and Christmas, and all they kept saying was that he had pneumonia and his lungs were filling up with fluid. Well, when the cough never went away even though he was on antibiotics, the doctors were stumped. They couldn't figure out what was causing him to feel so bad. 

This past Friday Sean's dad had a surgery scheduled where they went into his lungs to see what was causing him to have these awful symptoms. Sean, his mom and I sat in the waiting room with bated breath, anxiously anticipating the arrival of the doctor. A lady pulled us into a private room in the corner of the nicest hospital in uptown Charlotte and the lung surgeon came gently into the room.

The news was not what anyone expected... Sean's dad, on January 10th, 2014, was diagnosed with lung cancer. He's as healthy as a horse, and only 2% of non-smokers get it, but for some reason God chose him. We are still not yet sure what type we are facing, but either way it is a surreal thing to process. Sometimes it is difficult to understand why things happen the way that they do.

The only thing that I know will help get Sean's dad and his family through all of this is faith. God heals and works miracles and we have to trust that he will provide. The upcoming months and years are going to be tough, but I know we will get through it together with unfailing love.


For God has said, "I will never fail you. I will never abandon you." So we can say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper, so I will have no fear!" - Hebrews 13:5

Faith & Love.

Monday, January 13, 2014
Today, in this cold but clear weather, my boyfriend and I went exploring around Charlotte! We tried a new restaurant called Tupelo Honey Cafe which was absolutely amazing (with an awesome gluten free menu), we went window shopping at some little stores near Uptown, we sipped on a mint mocha latte from Dilworth Coffee, and we enjoyed the skyline, one of Sean's favorite things. It was the perfect day out!

I tried to wear some color today since I usually stick with neutrals. I topped my UO aztec sweater over a big, baggy thermal my older brother out-grew. I'm not sure how I feel about it. I think I may have overdone it a little bit on the brights! Gray, white, tan and black are my signature colors. Oh well... it was worth a shot! What do you think?
Hat, Urban Outfitters. Denim, Forever 21. Sweater, Urban Outfitters. Bag, N/A. Baggy Thermal, Walmart. Sunglasses, Madewell. Ring, Bead Box. Shoes, Coach.

A Day Out.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014
Happy Monday! I'm finally back home after a week away. Time for Christmas shopping, family time, celebrating with close friends and simple holiday festivities! 

I had the best time in Greenville. My boyfriend's journey towards graduation hit a little bump in the road, but everything we go through together makes our relationship that much stronger. I don't know what I'd do without him! A surprise hug as I try and take a #OOTN picture for Instagram turned into one of the best pictures I've taken recently, even if it's a little fuzzy!
In other news, here are a few things that I'm wishing I could add to my wish list this year...

1) Nasty Gal - Kissell Plaid Coat: I love plaid for fall and winter. It is such a cozy print! 

2) Aldo - Rusova Ankle Boot: Ankle boots are my new bff. Tucked into boyfriend jeans with some bunched up socks? Yes please.

3) ily Couture - Mixed Stone Necklace: Chunky statement necklaces are the go-to jewelry accessory these days and this one has the ideal mix of festive colors.

4) Asos - Wool Mix Short Cable Beanie: I'm a hat connoisseur. I think I just like accessories that frame my face. Hats, turbans, glasses, sunglasses, you name it and I'd wear it.


What are you asking for this Christmas?

Wishin' & Hopin'

Monday, December 16, 2013
How was your Thanksgiving? Mine was awesome! Plenty of delicious food, pajamas, and lazy afternoons. I have so, so much to be thankful for! A loving family, an amazing boyfriend, a roof over my head, freedom, great friends, safety, clean clothes, home cooked meals, hot water... the list goes on and on! Aren't we blessed?

One thing that I want to focus on this holiday season is the fact that I wouldn't have anything if God didn't give it to me. He gives and he takes away, and he is so generous! I hate to break it to you...but you don't actually "own" anything that you have! Nope, it's really not yours. He provided it! Isn't that a crazy perspective for Christmas time? We're really lucky, you guys! So over the next few weeks I want to give more than I get! I want to help people have an amazing holiday, and I want to focus on the real "reason for the season!"

Here are some pictures from my family time & Thanksgiving feast...

Doesn't that look like fun? Relaxing with my friends and family is always the perfect recipe for happiness! What do you have to be thankful for and what are your ideas for giving back? I would love some suggestions!

Also, here's a quick preview of my patriotic street style post coming tomorrow! Stay tuned!

Thankful.

Monday, December 2, 2013
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